Category Archives: Marriage

Sexual Godliness (2/2)

September 19, 2012 By in Holiness, Marriage

III. The Devastation of Sexual Sin

Sexual sin is profoundly offensive to God and he attaches dire consequences to those who practice it. In the Old Testament under Mosaic law, adultery was punishable by death. And the Bible is full of grave warnings promising destruction to those who are sexually immoral.

The book of Proverbs is full of these warnings: “The lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil, but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword. Her feet go down to death; her steps follow the path to Sheol” (5:3-5); “He who commits adultery lacks sense; he who does it destroys himself” (6:32); “All at once he follows her, as an ox goes to the slaughter, or as a stag is caught fast till an arrow pierces its liver; as a bird rushes into a snare; he does not know that it will cost him his life” (7:22-23). Continue reading →

Sexual Godliness (1/2)

September 18, 2012 By in Holiness, Marriage

The following article is a guest contribution by Dale VanDyke, pastor of Harvest Orthodox Presbyterian Church in Wyoming, Michigan. It was originally preached as a sermon on Exodus 20:14 on September 9th, and is published here with permission of the author.

Of all the ten commandments there may not be one which is more gleefully and flagrantly violated in our popular culture more than the seventh. Internet pornography is a $10 billion a year business. For a good part of this year, the top three sellers on the New York Times list were books of erotic romance targeting women with “mommy porn”. Publishers are rushing to capitalize on the demand for this brand new genre. Homosexuality has become mainstream and those who believe it is sin will increasingly be targeted for persecution.

Unfortunately, the American church has been unprepared for this erotic onslaught. You could easily argue that our failures to keep this commandment have brought more grief, guilt and shame into the lives of God’s people than any other. There is no way I can possibly address all the issues raised by the seventh commandment. Today, I hope we can delight in the liberty of the seventh commandment as God seeks to free his people from the sensual bondage of the nations around them and live as a kingdom of priests in relation to marriage and sex. Continue reading →

Guys, It Matters Whom You Marry, Too

September 12, 2012 By in Marriage

Just as a woman must think carefully about a potential husband, you must be careful about a potential wife. Careful evaluation in a number of areas will save you a lifetime of frustration. Right now, you might think she’s pretty, or playful, or nice to you. It’s not enough. One pregnancy can alter a figure, responsibilities at home can reveal laziness, and a disagreement about money can turn her against you. The church in North America has many men who are hampered in their abilities and success because they were distracted by a pretty face who now seems to bring more trouble than bliss.

Just as a girl can’t imagine how much of an impact a husband will have on her unless an older woman is very frank with her, so you can’t imagine how that attractive girl you know could impact your life unless someone is very frank with you. Marriage will impact nearly every area of your life. Ready? Continue reading →

It Matters Whom You Marry

August 15, 2012 By in Marriage, Women

My husband and I were once with a youth group. There were three kids sitting across from us at a meal: two guys and a girl. The one guy was a computer geek with glasses. The other one was a college student with slightly cooler hair and no glasses. The girl was obviously with him. But while the computer geek was busy serving everyone at the meal, clearing plates and garbage, the college student got angry with the girl for a small accident and poured red juice over her leather jacket and white shirt. She picked the wrong guy, and the juice didn’t seem to change her mind. She is in for some grief if that relationship continues and especially if it leads to marriage.

So to all the young, unmarried Christian girls out there, listen up: who you marry matters. Continue reading →

The Absent Minded Husband

July 4, 2012 By in Marriage

Can you see any of the following scenarios happening in your home?

- After several years of marriage, your husband asks what date your birthday is.
- Instead of bringing your daughter and her friends to ballet class, your husband automatically drives them to his office.
- Your husband volunteers to change the baby, and you discover later that he forgot to put on a clean diaper on after he took off the wet one.
- You husband comes running into the room where you are, panicking that he has forgotten to ________. You explain that you took care of it weeks ago. Continue reading →

Wives and Burnout

May 9, 2012 By in Marriage

It struck me last week while watching David Murray’s video on burnout in the ministry that pastor’s wives have an impact on if and why burnout happens. This is not always the case – many things are out of our hands, and sometimes a husband will burn out no matter what we do. Often, wives are powerless to stop something that they can see coming. But we can always pray (and must, regardless of how things are going!), and we can also take measures to make sure that we are not contributing factors. Growing up in a manse and seeing countless ministry couples, the cases I’ve seen of wives contributing to or causing burnout tend to fall into two categories: the co-burnout helpmeet and the high-maintenance wife. Continue reading →

Vows: Don’t Write Your Own

April 9, 2012 By in Marriage

Imagine you’re watching the next presidential inauguration and it’s time for the elected person to take the vows of office. But instead of hearing what Americans have for centuries, the person in charge of the event explains that because the president loves America so much and wants a special, personal relationship with the country, he has written his own vows, and that’s what they will use to swear him in.

Comfortable? I hope not. Continue reading →